tonight is a night for the thunder to come. i feel like the thickness in my stomach has dispersed itself all over my thighs, layers, over my hipbones, in my forearms even; there it will sit. it's waiting. waiting for the snow, the rain, the cold winds of winter. its almost here. i want to stand, arms outstretched to fingers, feet taking root into my front yard. i want to spread and grow tangley branches, leaves, the skeletal decay of summer shrubs. goodbye, green world. phones ring and all i can see are words from boys with dicks as big as their egos. they want me to come out and play and i'm never sure why. i want to stand tall like downtown skyscrapers but heavy metal only stays straight for so long.. i wait and the seconds fold over themselves into minutes and i want to melt myself into my seat. there is nothing here for you, i want to say. my inner child is clawing her way out of my charcoal heart with muffled screams of loneliness. like a nurturing mother, i stay wary and shy away from the bright light of my cell phone. ice blue skies will soon be beaming down upon my pasty cheeks and i will be wrapping my fingers tighter around my morning cups of coffee. last night i was water, nourishing the mud of my life. squishy and beat down, he's hardening like the first frost of autumn. nothing but pride. how is it that i can run so underground inside my veins and find all life is a metaphor for something else is a symbol for something else is just another meaning for another something else. i feel too intricate. have you ever worn red lipstick and the pink dye seep into the wrinkles around your mouth? or like those little lines and wrinkles patterned into your palm that left black imprints around my heart. kinda intense only not. you're right, no one has a fucking clue. when it comes down to it, everyone just wants to get their nut.
08.20.06                                      so fucking st e r  i   l    e  .
stop plagiarism.
© 2005 me